And I'm stuck in a moment that wasn't meant to last

I've made this little bet with myself to go for as long as I can without looking at you-know-who's facebook profile. Everytime I'm on there, I check it. It's sad. Really sad. It's become this reflex action. I go on facebook, see if I have any messages, check my profile, check his, and so on...I AM over him. At least my mind is. But I have a feeling that my heart will never be. It'll take time--lots of it, or another guy--to erase it. And by doing the things that I keep doing--the facebook checking, for example--doesn't help me any. Sometimes I see things that I don't want to see, and then I don't feel so great. But it's my own fault. I don't want to think about him anymore. I want to be COMPLETELY over him. I thought I was. Or at least I led myself to believe I was. Or maybe I was just lying to myself. Whatever the case, I shouldn't be wasting any time on him at all. Because I know that he'll never feel the same way, and I'm just not on his mind, ever. And that's ok, because I DON'T NEED HIM. I saw that he might be in town this week. And I was actually about to alter my plans and do whatever I could to possibly run into him last night--that's why I wanted to go to AJ's instead of where I went. But then I realized, why the hell should I do that? Why see him? It won't make you feel any better. It'll only make it worse, because you know nothing would happen. At the worst, I'd succumb to seeing him and doing something really stupid--again. And I don't want to take that risk. There are SO MANY guys out there who are better than him. That are a MILLION times better for me than he will EVER BE. And I know this. I do. I really do. But why can't I get him out of my head? I don't think about him as much as I used to, so I guess that means he's fading somewhat. But he was special to me, and I really, really liked him. That's why it's not easy. It never has been easy to get over those guys. But I've done it in the past, and I'll do it again. I just wish I wasn't practicing this obsessive-type behavior. I'm not obsessed. I just don't want to let go. But yes, I do.