Look at this photograph, everytime it always makes me laugh

I think I found an organization that I'm really going to try and be involved in...I was invited to join the Golden Key International Honor Society recently, and they had this interest-type meeting this evening, so I decided to check it out and see what it was about. They do community service type activities and are one of the only honor societies that actively participate on campus. I may decide to run for an office position, since pretty much everything is open, so we'll see. It's a really prestigious organization, so I think it'll be good to be involved, since I don't really think I want to continue doing the College Democrats right now. I still need to look around and see what else is available to get involved with, because I want to find something that I really enjoy and can participate in. I want to take a dance class. I miss dancing like I used to do. There's gotta be a class out there for college-age people just wanting to dance for fun once a week. Particularly one that is free would be best, but I'm sure my parents would probably pay for it if I was really serious about it, since they probably know that I have to miss it somewhat. Afterall, it was a huge part of my life, and I'd done it since I was 3 years old...Tonight is one of those nights were no one really wants to go out, which makes me feel better about not going out. I honestly don't feel like it-- I'm tired, I have stuff to do, I don't feel like drinking, and I don't want to be falling asleep in all of my classes tomorrow. So yay for people not wanting to go out either, because I'd feel left out and more compelled to go out if other people were...So, I haven't talked to Skip in a while. And he hasn't called me, either. Whatever. I've got mixed feelings about it. On the one hand, I'm a little upset, because after all, I do like him and it hurts that he doesn't want to see me or talk to me. But then again, I'm not really as distraught about it as I have been about other guys in the past. Maybe because I know exactly what he's not looking for right now (which is a girlfriend), and I don't want to be too overbearing and seem desperate and like I can't take a hint. I mean, as long as I continue hanging out with Blake, I know I have a good chance of running into him, and I still want to be at least friends (which means, yes, I'd still hookup with him!). Yet, it would be soooo hard to be out with him and see him with another girl. Unless I've found someone else by that point, which doesn't seem likely right now. I'm trying so hard to supress that nasty little voice in my head that seems to pop up more and more frequently--that I will never find a guy, or why no one wants to be my boyfriend or wants to get to know me. Of course, it doesn't help when you see couples kisses and holding hands (yuck, that stupid PDA!) or guys and girls shamelessly flirting and hanging all over each other. But I have to remind myself that there is someone out there, and I WILL find him. It's just not my time right now. You've got to go through tons of frogs to get to that one prince. And that's exactly what's been happening in my life this past year. And there's no reason why I should feel inadequate or not good enough or not pretty enough, because none of it's true. I've proven to myself that I CAN get practically any guy I want...but the problem has been I've been going for the wrong ones, or the ones who don't want anything serious and just want to play the field. And hey, making out with lots of guys is fun, and it's not always so bad being single. I mean, look at how I've met all of these guys...I've been out, and I've been drunk everytime, which is not the best place or situation to meet someone decent. However, I really wonder where to find other guys, since my classes are pretty devoid of cute guys. And I know because sadly, it was the first thing I looked at when I went to my classes for the first time. Seriously, when did I become so boy-crazy?? But it's really okay. I'm just taking it in stride, reminding myself that I don't want to settle. Yeah, there is someone that wants me (however, he did cheat on me twice, and I have no feelings for him whatsoever), but I'm not going to make that mistake again. I did it once, and realized in retrospect that I lowered my standards significantly and was probably trying to believe that I like him when I really didn't. It was more about liking having someone there for me, rather than actually liking the person. And anyways, I deserve someone who would never even think twice about cheating on me. And someone who calls me just to say hi or see how I was. I'm tired of doing all the work for nothing. It's useless and only makes me look pathetic. I don't need to do that to myself. I don't need a guy to be happy or to be complete. You should never go into a relationship or looking for someone to complete you, because you'll always be dependent on that person for your happiness. They're supposed to complement you, enhance what you've already found within yourself. Not the other way around. I'm proud of myself for resisting the urge to call. I was thinking about it yesterday, but I decided that what's the point? You'll only be disappointed in the end, because what I'm looking for will not just magically appear in someone who doesn't want the same thing. I'll meet that guy, and even if he says he isn't looking for a relationship at first when he meets me, there will be someone who is just so captivated by me that he realizes he can't let me get away. And that will be the luckiest guy in the world!