back and forth, up and down, like a rollercoaster

Just got back from Target. Got some cute bathing suits. And 2 cute bags. I love that store. They just have the cutest stuff. Anyways, I cancelled my plans tonight--partly because I chickened out, but mainly because I feel so overwhelmed with studying right now...after my classes today, I realize I'm not nearly as prepared as I want to be...so that's what'll I'll be doing these next 3 days. Which really sucks. So, I'll just have to wait until after spring break to meet him. I'm not sure now if I really want to still meet him or not--I'm scared. Maybe it's too soon...I might have been rushing things a bit. And am I still dating Adam or what? Just because he hasn't called me back, does that mean he doesn't want anything to do with me anymore? Or maybe he got really busy (but there's still no excuse for why he can't take 2 minutes out of his life and call me). What am I saying? The guy hasn't called me...why should I want anything to do with him still? Is this how I want to be treated? I need some advice. Should I call him? And just ask him (or if he doesn't answer, leave him a message) what's going on? If he doesn't want to see me again, all he's gotta do is just tell me. And then I won't ever bother him again. I just desperately need to know. Why did this have to happen? It was going so great--not perfect, but we worked it out. I just want to see him again. If you'd seen the way he acted around me...I mean, he even kissed me in front of his friends a couple times (in a really cute, playful way)...doesn't that mean something? Or am I just too naive? I need to talk to Anne. I just can't get over the boy...at least, not yet until I know for sure. Well, it's time to workout now and then have a wonderful night of studying!